HGTV DESIGN STAR SEASON 5

So the commercials have started, the bloggers have begun critiquing us and the phone is ringing with interview requests.  Super, super, super weird.  I just keep thinking, me? wait, you want to talk to me? why? 

oh yeah, because i'm on a reality show.  perfectly normal.  

So i figured i might as well let you guys in on some of the drama before my interviews start.  

*Also this blog is basically my style journal - huh, that sounds lame, don't it? - so this is where i document that part of my life.  I started it to organize my thoughts about what i love and why when it comes to style and photography, but people seem to respond to the personal stuff just as much,  so, when in rome. ahem.  I really, really, really don't think i'm self-obsessed, but there is a good chance that i will blog about the show pretty often until it ends Aug 22 and I hope I don't come off as such.  It is super exciting and weird and interesting and writing it down here will make it permanent, you know, for the children...also I haven't been able to talk about it until last friday, so i'm still kinda bursting from having such a big secret for a long time).

So, here's what i would be curious about if I were you, god, i hate presuming that you are curious, as if you have nothing else to do but be curious about my reality tv-hood, BUT if you are:

Some often asked questions:

Yes, we were quarantined - no interaction with the outside world at all. that includes spouses, kids, parents, etc for the entire time we were filming.  We stayed in a penthouse in a hotel in New York.  I didn't see any friends in New York, no one even knew I was there.  So weird.  

Yes, i cried - this should not surprise you.  i'm a quick weep.  the real question is how many times and how much of it you will see.

was it fun? that's a tricky word 'fun'. Was it exciting? more exciting than anything I've ever done......ever.

made friends? absolutely.

create drama? yep, unfortunately.

regrets? that I didn't bring my A game sooner, also that i just said  'A game'.  But seriously, its a really foreign situation and I wish I had adjusted quicker.

favorite part?  that you never, ever, ever knew what you would be doing in 10 minutes.  Yes, this is super frustrating BUT in retrospect it made every second interesting, important, nerve racking, completely and utterly fascinating.  Some times I would give into it and let myself be at their mercy and think 'go ahead and do your worst', and other times i/we would overanalyze every possible detail we were given, desperate to find out what would happen next.  In a nutshell:  It becomes one huge adrenaline rush that lasts as long as you do.  Of course i'm psyched about a lot of the people i met, but i coulda met them anywhere and i would have liked them.    The rush and excitement of constant surprise is pretty hard to duplicate.   You become a complete adrenaline junky.  Life is just so interesting here.  It's why bands love to go back on the road. and why soldiers want to go back to war....yes, i just compared HGTV design star to actual soldiers risking their actual real lives at war.   But then again,  i didn't compete in the 'most appropriate metaphors' reality show, thank god.  

Oh, and here is a huge misconception about reality shows - they (the Mark Burnett producers) don't try to create drama.  Sure, they put us in unusual situations that are dramatic, BUT there is no pinning us against each other, no emotional manipulation, no contrived situations, they really just try to document authentic actions and reactions - we create the drama.  Riddle me this, readers  - if you put 12 really strong personalities that all think they deserve their own TV show into a penthouse for a few hours, guess what might happen? d.r.a.m.a. - not all of us and not all the time, but it'll happen, often and ugly.   I'm sure other production companies are different, but these guys weren't trying to stir the pots - we did that all on our own.

(ahem... i haven't seen the show yet, obviously, so who knows how i'll be portrayed...i might take all of that back.)  

So there is more where that came from. guess you'll have to come back. and for the record, I want people to watch the show, therefore I want exposure for it.  If you guys know any media (print, blog, tv) at all that might be interested in interviews about the show, hit me up.  there is one hoop to jump through, but it's pretty painless.  I figure if i'm on it, i might as well help it be as successful as possible.  

oh, and also i want more readers.  i'm no idiot....ish.